My Heartsongs

The endless stream of negative headlines continues. Time to get out of Dodge and camp with my men’s group on the Chama river. The juxtaposition of Nature time with the general level of angst experienced by many these days got me musing about the notion of ambiguous loss—a loss that is unclear, lacks resolution, and much more difficult to grieve.

The basic premise of the Black Swan Theory is that some rare events are entirely unpredictable, yet they have extreme impact in terms of the course of human history. Humanity itself seems to be riding two horse drawn chariots towards the portal of our future, complete with furious wheels churning, propelled by beasts pushed to their limits. We might name the two forces Evolution and Ruination.

Ever stayed in a job or relationship too long because of the “good stuff,” ignoring the downsides? Those golden handcuffs are hard to get off once in place. Especially in terms of the amount of stuff that gets accumulated along the way. The way through seems to be to instead shift my focus to what brings me alive.

The philosophical term qualia refers to the myriad subjective conscious experiences we all have: bodily pain, the colors of a sunset, the taste of ripe fruit. We live on the same planet as everyone else, but we actually think, feel and sensate in different ones. What I cherish becomes the north star of my being, doing and having. Values represent my own center of gravity that consistently anchors me to my greatest self, the Big Self.

Both invention and the creative juices that inspire it require us to be fully present, which essentially means to be observant, to listen, to flow without judgment, and be less in our minds and thoughts than in our bodies and feelings. To just be with whatever is happening is a skill one must develop, especially in these times of constant stim, streaming screens and screaming headlines.

To properly tend to, I first have to turn off the everyday distractions that plague this modern life, and muster the willingness to tune in. My sense is that we benefit from a hefty dose of it each week— this surrendering to actively listen to what our spirit has to say. We generate tenderness toward our foibles and missteps, our conflicting emotions, our failures to not live up to our most cherished values. Only then might we begin to tend the other.

Creating a healing ceremony with loving friends often helps us move beyond past and current hurt. Even if we have to do it on Zoom! We might use our creative imagination and tune into the healing light within each of us to find our way to a meaningful shared ceremony. And we are not doing this in isolation! Enter the global response network of Shamanism without Borders.

This is a planetary moment of great ecoanxiety,  pandemicmania, and racial disparity reckoning. Suspending rationality, daydreams invite us to try on different costumes of an imagined future, sparking new ideas and options that might not arise in a jammed overstuffed scheduled day.

 

 

The chance encounter – unintended meeting of persons unfamiliar to each other – becomes even more mysterious in these lockdown times, and perhaps worthy of bowing down to honor the universal force of synchronicity. It cannot be denied that there are those moments in our lives when a seemingly random meeting has great influence on the course and direction of our life. What were some of yours?

Our minds have been manipulated to give power to illusions. Infinite human growth on a finite planet is suicide. We are destroying the planet with our extreme numbers and careless behaviors, not CO2! So what am I willing to give up? The edge of change – real and necessary transformation – is sharpened when we simplify what we have been conditioned to believe we need. Spending time “out” is the cutting edge of making that so.